Bridget Bread

 In my last week at work, we had a tea party at school which was entirely catered for by the children. Each class prepared something different. For one class it was sandwiches. As staff we had to go and get everything for our mass catering session. Two of us doing the catering, live alone. We have no idea how much a bog standard sliced loaf is. Not because we don't eat bread, but because we buy Bridget Bread.
Bridget Bread is those small 3/4 size loaves for those who live alone. Even with this size loaf, I inevitably end up giving a fair bit to the pigeons.
Shopping and queueing up at the checkouts at the supermarket is a revealing thing. You can make a lot of observations about someone by what's in their trolley/basket. Tesco could learn a lot from me. I think I make better jugdements than they do. For a while, they assumed I had become a parent and sent me all manner of things about babies and becoming a parent. They had based this assumption on the fact that I purchase Baby Wipes. I buy them because they are an all purpose wonder tool. They clean my face, my hands after I fill my tyres with air, spillages of nail polish...they are indispensable. Whoever at Tesco decides you have had a baby because you have purchased Baby Wipes is an idiot.
"YES, everything I need for my helpless infant is here in this moist wipe. I have no need for nappies, food, lotion, cotton wool etc etc. It is all here in this wonder wipe!" 
However, I am obviously a singleton. I buy Bridget Bread, I buy a 2pt bottle of semi skimmed milk, and apart from cake ingredients, I rarely buy food which I will have to prepare from scratch. I cannot see the point, and neither do I have the time to slave over a meal for an hour just for me. Unlike the L'oreal advert...It's not worth it.
More revealing about my home status is the fact that I never take advantage of any fresh ingredient BOGOF offers. I would end up binning it. I do the frozen or cupboard ones, but not fruit, veg, chiller cabinet or the like. Why do they never offer me BOGOF make up or CD's?
I went around to my neighbour's house yesterday. She had taken in a dress for me which I bought some years ago, wore to a wedding, then lost a stone so it fell down every time I tried it afterwards. I stayed for a cup of tea. They have two types of milk- she likes full fat, him semi skimmed. They talked to me about the garden and the fact that the hedgehog family are enjoying the slugs which in turn are enjoying the plants. She has suggested slug pellets, but he refuses to kill anything in the garden.
I never argue over my Bridget Bread.